You know what’s interesting about conflict? In the moment, you always feel justified. Your point of view makes sense, to you. Your reaction feels reasonable, to you. Your frustration feels warranted, to you.
And that’s exactly where things can start to go sideways.
Recently, I had a situation with someone I really care about. I found myself getting frustrated, and before I knew it, that frustration escalated into unnecessary conflict. Not because the issue was that big… but because I was so locked into my perspective that I never stopped to consider theirs.
I wasn’t listening to understand. I was listening to defend. And that’s the moment we quietly move ourselves out of the front-row in our relationships.
Because front-row living isn’t about being right, it’s about being aware. It’s about recognizing that there is always another side to the story, even when we can’t see it yet.
So how do you reduce unnecessary conflict before it escalates? You don’t need a script. You don’t need a strategy. You just need a pause. A breath.
And a question. Instead of reacting, get curious.
“Help me understand your perspective.”
“Help me understand your side of this.”
“What am I missing?”
Those simple questions do something powerful. They shift the energy in the conversation. They lower defenses—yours and theirs. They create space for understanding instead of escalation. Now, let’s be clear… curiosity doesn’t guarantee agreement. But it does guarantee connection.
And when people feel seen and heard, everything changes. So, this week, pay attention to those moments when you feel yourself getting defensive. That little voice that says, “But they’re wrong.” That urge to jump in and prove your point. Pause. And choose curiosity instead. Because the goal isn’t to win the argument. The goal is to win the relationship.
On this Front-Row Friday, I wish for you fewer conflicts and stronger connections, both personally and professionally, by choosing curiosity over defensiveness.
Happy Front-Row Friday!
Your Head Usher,
Marilyn
