Today’s Front-Row Friday message is about avoiding the comparison trap. You know the one – where you see someone else’s shiny life and feel like you don’t measure up. But guess what? I’m here to tell you that comparing yourself to others is a game you can’t win, and you shouldn’t even be playing!
When you play the comparison game it’s a trap because whenever you look at someone else, you never come out equal. You always come out either better than or less than, (which is more common), and neither one of these outcomes serve you.
So how do you let go of the comparison trap? How do you stop comparing yourself to other people, especially those you think are better than you? Here are three strategies:
First: look at the whole picture. When you see someone drive by or see their post on social media, (those perfect Instagram posts are only showing you a tiny slice of reality and not all the outtakes and photoshopping to get that one perfect post) you are only seeing a slice of their life. You have no idea what’s going on behind closed doors. For example, if someone has a fancy car, you have no idea how much debt they might be in. So, next time you compare yourself to someone else, imagine their whole life and then look at your whole life. Ask yourself, would you trade your whole life for theirs? Chances are you would not. Recognize that you are only seeing a slice of what’s happening so don’t forget to look at the big picture.
Secondly, try this approach: instead of being jealous or envious of someone else, celebrate them. Look at somebody and let your first reaction be:
- Bravo, good on you.
- Fantastic! Look at how well you are doing!
- Congratulations – you look like you’re living your best life.
Even if you don’t know them, play a mental game where you send out that celebratory “good job” or ‘bravo” to someone you may have been jealous or envious of in the past. I suggest mentally cheering for others instead of envying them, it’s a fun and empowering mental switch!
Finally, remember that you are enough. When you feel confident and comfortable in your own skin, when you feel like you’re doing the best you can, putting one foot in front of the other and giving your best self every single day, you are less likely to play the comparison game. And remember, at the same time you might be jealous of someone else, there’s someone out there who is looking at and admiring you. So, take a moment to stop and appreciate the fact that you are enough. There is magic of being comfortable in your own skin and knowing you’re already amazing.
On this Front-Row Friday, I hope you don’t compare yourself to anybody else today. Just look in the mirror and say, bravo. Good on you, mate.
Your Head Usher,
Marilyn
