Are you ever around toxic, negative people? There’s one tool that I want you to add to your toolkit to maintain your positive energy, credibility, and composure, even when around someone super negative.
Here’s the tip: Make something up about their childhood. This is a mindset hack for you to reduce the chances of being defensive, angry, or combative with this individual. It’s not the only tip, but it’s a good one because we make up stories about people all the time anyway. It’s called judgement. So, make up a story to help you stay calm. For example, if there is someone not displaying decorum or positive etiquette and your assertive communication skills aren’t working, (and your energy is shifting toward the negative) then make up a story. This is not to rationalize away bad behavior; it’s meant to shift your perspective and help you respond better. A made-up story could be that maybe they didn’t have parents to nurture them. Maybe they never had role-models or mentors that demonstrated kindness. Maybe they never read “How to Win Friends and Influence People“, and certainly they’ve never been exposed to a dynamic motivational speaker! How sad is that? Now, if I were to use that story in my head, my energy changes to empathy and a bit of sadness… but NOT defensiveness or aggravation. And I wouldn’t be angry at all.
Good luck and let me know how that goes!
P.S. You can’t tell anyone your made-up story, that’s only for YOU to maintain your front-row composure and calmness around them.
Your Head Usher,
